NOTHING
CAN BE DONE
A Prime Suspect Fan Fiction.
By Cappuccino Girl Spoilers/ Timeline: Post The
Last Witness by almost a year. Feedback: is love. cappuccinogirlie@hotmail.com Notes: Big thanks to go the
delightful Cheapmetaphor for her stylish little beta. Title shamelessly
stolen from the same-titled Joni Mitchell song, which you should listen
to if you haven't already done so. Summary: maybe they can fool
themselves into being equals this time She's walking to the underground
station on her way back from the Old Bailey with the wind in her hair.
It's a crisp evening filled with bright lights and a steady flow of
people who swish past her in a blur of black coats and briefcases and
expensive cologne. The press has been relatively
sparse since the beginning of Jankovic's trial, and when she's honest
with herself, that damn congestion charge does work. So the car stayed
in the driveway, in spite of the fact that she was required to give
evidence today. It's hardly something that worries her anymore. She's
come to terms with the fact that the Q.C.s will be supportive and the
prosecution bigger bastards than some of the criminals she's had to
deal with. It goes with the turf like sexual advances and decomposed
corpses. Once the case is over, she'll close the mental file forever.
She knows her colleagues would
like to be done with her forever in much the same way. It's not like
they haven't tried all manner of ways over the years. It almost bores
her these days, because she's been through it all a hundred times before
and sooner or later repetition becomes tedious, like writing thank-you
letters for unwanted gifts. The heel of one of her shoes
catches on a slightly raised paving slab, causing her to stumble. In
her mind, the comotion slows down and she can feel herself falling to
the ground. She stretches her arm out in front of her because she'd
rather that got scraped up than the rest of her, but her hand catches
something warm and familiar on the way down and, somehow, she doesn't
smash her knees open. She gasps and retracts her
hand and brushes her skirt and coat back down to their proper place
at her sides. She realises that
she's standing right in front of a blue moleskin jacket and open shirt.
"Hello, Jane." She'd
recognise that voice anywhere, anytime. "Oswalde," she says.
By taking a step back, she's able to look up further so that she can
see his face. "This is mildly humiliating," she says with
a self-derogatory chuckle. He pulls her over to the side of the pavement
so that they're out of the way of the masses rushing back to their
homes. They stare blankly into space
for a few moments before Jane braves asking, "What brings you to
this corner of the country? They haven't sent you back to the Met without
telling me, have they?" "No. Still in Bristol."
He sighs. "It seems like forever since I last saw you." "Maybe because it has
been. Where are you heading?" "It's my nephew's wedding
tomorrow, and because he doesn't have room to put me up, I've booked
into a smallish B&B for the night. Right now I'm just wandering
around in the hope of finding familiar places." "And faces," she
remarks. "If you've really not got anything planned, come back
to my place for tea." He doesn't need much persuading,
and so they walk toward the tube station like the old friends and enemies
that they had been ten years ago. She
no longer swings her briefcase, he notices, and they walk side
by side. He's making an effort to walk slower so that she doesn't need
to rush in order to keep up, and maybe they can fool themselves into
being equals this time. ~* *~ She still lives in the same
grotty old house that she used to, although she must have shoved some
of her considerable pay rise into making the place more habitable. She's
got a wilting pot-plant on a stand in the hallway, and the carpets have
been removed, in favor of sanded-down floor boards. He's convinced that
this is because she can get away without hoovering quite so often, rather
than some home decorating fashion statement. "Does it feel good to
be back?", she asks while she closes the three security locks behind
her. "In London? I'm here at
least once a year. Nothing's really changed, nothing out of proportion
anyway. What's changed in Bristol has changed here," Robert says
as he tosses his coat on to the sofa. He doesn't feel the need to ask
her whether she's married. It's a given that she's not, and he can't
see a reason to tell her that he's married and since divorced. They
never talked about personal things before. "Your living room's
a different color though, I think." "Mmm. And the kitchen's
been redone. You want a drink?" "Please." "Whiskey alright? And
please, take a seat." She walks out to the kitchen
to wash two glasses. He loves the sound of mildly stressed clattering,
the tap coming on far too strong and the water pounding against the
metal basin. Her ceiling can't have been repainted because he remembers
the brownish rim around the lamp fitting from his last visit. Two shoes fly out of the kitchen
door before Jane emerges with a dish towel and dripping glasses. "Tell me about your cases,
about your life," Bob asks, more out of politeness than a need
to know. Jane smiles, sly and brooding.
"You still think I can't separate the two, don't you?" "You're still far too
paranoid." She screws the lid back onto
the bottle and hands him his whiskey and their glasses clink. They drink
but don't know to what or whom. Robert pulls a packet of cigarettes
out of his shirt pocket and eases one out for himself, then offers her
one. "No thanks. I'm trying
to quit." "That's something I never
expected to hear." He lights it and inhales deeply. She watches
him breathe out away from her. "How long?" he asks when he
turns around again. Jane takes a sip of her whiskey,
and he wonders how she can make such a simple act appear so precise.
"Well, I haven't." "What do you mean?"
"I try, and each time
it lasts about a month and then I light up again, but everyone gives
me this approving look, much like the one you have on
now, so I keep telling people that I have." She stares at
her stained coffee table. "So you do want one?" "Yes." "And all you really wanted
was a supportive glance?" "Mmm. I rarely receive
them. They're quite precious." She takes a cigarette from the packet
on the table and lights hers with the tip of his. "Some things never change."
"You always thought the
best of people, didn't you? I remember liking that about you. An appealing
quality in a cop." They both lean back and rest
their feet on the table, relishing their bad habits. "So, what have you been
up to then Bob since you last scuttled out of here with your tail between
your legs? Has to have been far more interesting than the shit that's
been going on with me lately." "Work's been good. I got
promoted to head of vice last year." "Good good." "And I moved house a few
months ago. My mother fractured her hip last month, so I've had to take on some extra responsibilities there.
My father just isn't fully up to it anymore." "The new place is closer?" "It's about ten minutes
drive from their house." "Convenient." "It is." He takes
a final drag of his cigarette before stubbing it out. "How's work
treating you then?" She laughs, and it's artificial
and heaped with sarcasm and contempt. "They tried to shove retirement
on me. The thing I just came back from doing today, the Jankovic trial,
well, during that one they tried to convince me to retire. The usual
things: you've served your time, getting older, blahblah. They've been
desperate for a reason for years and now that they think they've got
a genuine one... Not that I didn't fuck them over royally during that
investigation, mind you. If I wouldn't have been right, they probably
would have sacked me." "I have no trouble believing
that." He watches her shoulders slump in and her head drop to her
chest. "Are you going to take it?" he asks. She drains the glass of whiskey
in her hand in a feeble attempt at finding clarity, and pours herself
another one when it obviously isn't going to work. "Don't know,"
she says, punctuating herself by sliding the bottle across the table
to Robert. "Would you take the money and leave?" "If I thought they just
wanted to done with me?" Jane nods. "No. I'd leave when I
was wanted the most." "It's that rather selfish?" "Yes, but when have you
ever cared about that?" He replenishes his drink and
tops hers up as well while he's at it. They both stare at each others'
feet that rest on the table. It's a shame that palm readings don't work
for feet, she muses, because she's convinced that she sees a long life-line
on left his one, or is it a crease line from his socks? "So," says Bob after
an unusually long silence, "Are we just going to sit here
and get silently smashed, or is there some dinner in this for me as
well?" "I did promise." "Yes, you did." "And I always keep my
promises," she says with a smile. He helps her up from the sofa
and they drag each other to the kitchen. The work surface is covered
with semi-dissolved Nescafe granules, but everything else is spotless.
Jane plonks herself onto the kitchen table and lets her legs swing about
while she finishes her third glass of whiskey and stares into her neighbours'
bedroom window, hoping for her regular cheap Friday entertainment. Meanwhile, Bob decides to get
to work. First port of call: fridge. He opens the door, revealing two
large bottles of Diet Coke, a box of All Bran and a jar of ready-made
pasta sauce. He holds it up. "This is empty." "So? Put it in the bin
then," she says from her place on the table. He goes to toss it
away, but, "No. wash it out first and put it in the green recycling
bag next to the tumble dryer." The bag is hidden from sight, so
he keeps staring at the space between the fridge and the doorway. "Give
me that," she snaps while lunging off the table to snatch the jar
from him. Jane puts the tap on full whack and scalds herself on the
water while she washes the thing out. Bob steps back into the doorway,
distancing himself from the lousy food and the increasingly sour mood
of his hostess. "I was going to cook for
you but I obviously can't, can I? Unless there is some recipe for All
Bran I haven't heard about. Doesn't even belong in the fridge to start
with." He pauses before stating the obvious. "I should have
found a pub like I had planned." She dries her hands on a dishtowel
and wrings it out when she's done, which turns her knuckles a bright
white. "I don't fuck colleagues anymore, Robert," she says
remarkably calmly. "All they ever do is fuck me over and leave
a note on the bedside table the next morning. 'Sorry to have ruined
your career prospects. Much love, Sad Wanker.'" "I suppose I could be
glad to see that your cynicism is still in tact." "Some things never change,
remember?" "I did say that, didn't
I?" Bob stares at the lone box of cereal sitting on the worktop. "Should we get a take-away?" "Yeah. There's a pile
of numbers by the phone," she says on her way out of the room.
"Anything so long as it isn't Indian or pizza and they'll deliver."
She wanders back into the living room to collapse on the sofa and pour
herself another whiskey. When he sits down next to her
again, she's flipping between Sky News, ITV, and some home shopping
channel. "You must have really
wanted it," he says while staring at the photos displayed on her
bookshelf. She mutes the TV. "Wanted
what?" "To stay. Don't think
I didn't follow what went on when they re-opened the Marlow murders
nine years ago." "I suppose I did, yes."
He can tell that she doesn't like to talk about this. The corners of
her mouth tense up into fine lines and her eyes seem to lose focus.
"They don't like it when I'm right, when I have to go against the
grain to prove a point." "No team oriented employers
approve of that, Jane. Not the military; not the police." She fiddles with the creases
in her skirt. It's long and woolen and suddenly seems uncomfortable.
"Yeah, but what if the team needs to rethink things?" She
tugs at a loose thread while she speaks. "Isn't it always the pioneers,
the inventors, who improve the way things work?" "And the ones whose mistakes
have the gravest consequences." "I wasn't a sniper, Bob,"
she clarifies, his name as her highlighter pen. "I had a great
record of solving crimes-- correction-- have a great record.
Just because I sometimes rely on my own common sense rather than the
stupidity of others doesn't make me a bad person." "No, I never said that,
and they never managed to kill your visions off, so you can be proud
of that as well, but haven't you had enough of it now? I mean, how can
you still want to stick it out, all those men gagging to shove you out
the door?" He clinks the ice around in
his empty glass before setting it back onto its coaster. At this moment,
she thinks, would it even matter if she were despicable? Would anyone
care? "Why don't you just cash
your retirement check, accept a decent lecturing job at some university,
and be done with it all?" She leans into the space created
between his arm and his side and says, "I'm now, for the first
time in my life, in the position where I can genuinely change things.
I suppose I want to prove to everyone that it can be done." "By you." "By me." On the television, Big Ben
silently strikes seven. Robert strokes her hair. He knows she's given
almost everything else up for this and the fact that she believes now
will be different amazes him. They haven't quite managed to turn her
sour, not yet anyway. He hopes she'll put her stubbornness aside and
leave before they succeed. The masses always win eventually. The doorbell rings. "Food," she says.
"I'll deal with it." "No. I will." She
rolls over so she's facing him. As she's in the process of standing
up, she leans over, leaves a kiss on his forehead."I always do." ~* fin. |